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How to Approach Valentine’s Day in a New Relationship

The beginning stages of a new relationship can be so exhilarating. From the butterflies you feel every time you get a text from your new flame to still obsessing over the perfect outfit (because you’re not quite in the “see-me-in-sweats” stage), it’s exciting to discover your new relationship with every dating adventure.

But what happens when the world’s most romantic holiday comes up before you’ve had “the talk”? You know, the one that solidifies your official relationship status. Do you ignore it? Go big? What if they don’t reciprocate? Will an over-the-top gesture scare them off? The questions have the potential to turn a sweet day into a sour one.

But don’t worry! As the most straightforward online dating site, we’ve got you covered. Check out our 6 tips for how to approach Valentine’s Day in a new relationship.

1. What are Your Hopes for February 14th?

With more Adele filling the air than usual, it can be easy to get caught up in the idea of Valentine’s Day. But we encourage you to take a step back and think about your real hopes for the upcoming holiday with your new partner. Would you like the whole rom-com experience with flowers, a candlelit dinner, and a thoughtful surprise? Or are you Team Hallmark Holiday and would rather treat it like any other Tuesday? Or maybe you’re somewhere in between. Being honest with yourself about your expectations is the first step to a stress-free celebration (or lack thereof).

2. Communicate with Your Partner

Once you decide what it is you’re hoping for, it’s time to share it with your boo. We know, it may seem more awkward than that jeans under dresses phase (thank goodness that didn’t last), but you need to know where you each land on the sweetheart spectrum. If you’re on opposite ends, it may mean finding a creative way to meet in the middle. Think of it as another way to get to know your new connection!

3. Be Realistic

Regardless of what movies, commercials, and the card aisle at Target may say, how you and your partner approach Valentine’s Day is not the barometer for a successful new relationship. No matter how grand the gesture or how much of a paycheck was (or wasn’t) dropped on the celebration, it doesn’t necessarily go hand-in-hand with your partner’s feelings for you, especially if they feel like it’s just another day. Maybe showering you with goodies isn’t your connection’s MO, or how they show appreciation. Take into account how you are treated every other day of the year and let this speak louder than February 14th. 

4. K.I.S.S. – Keep It Super Simple

When in doubt, keep it simple. Acknowledge the chocolate-covered elephant in the room and decide what to do, or not do, on the day. Whether it’s meeting for a cocktail, going to a comedy club, or binge-watching your favorite show. Or maybe you just acknowledge the event with a silly GIF or card. The point is not to stress. It’s a day for celebrating the special people in our lives—and an excuse to indulge our sweet tooth. 

5. Don’t Give in to the Pressure

There is no need to feel pressured to profess your love in a new relationship on Valentine’s Day just because candy hearts are screaming BE MINE and I LUV U. However, it may be a good time to assess how you feel and not be afraid to share it. Even if it’s as simple as “I really like being around you” or “I love our dating adventures,” everyone likes to hear sweet nothings. Or better yet, go full-on DIY with a homemade card to pen your sentiments. 

6. Start Your First “Couple Thing”

If you do decide to embark on Valentine’s Day as a couple, it could be a great time to start a tradition. You could make a pact to do something cute and artsy together every year, like painting ceramic dishes and giving them to one another (after a few years together you could get a complete set!). Or you could choose to do something thoughtful for others and volunteer at an animal shelter or senior care center. 

Planning an out-of-the-chocolate box experience also takes the pressure off of selecting the perfect flowers or choosing the right card or gift. Whatever you decide to do depends on your vibe as a couple. Have fun with it!

No matter how you feel about the upcoming holiday, it’s important to be open and honest with your new partner. Don’t worry about what your IG feed is pushing as the “hottest thing to do for the ultimate V-day” or let Hollywood hits make your relationship feel less than perfect because you didn’t end up in Tiffany & Co. with your partner asking you to “choose”. 

You don’t have to take the back seat, either. Hop into the driver’s seat of your dating life by logging into WhatsYourPrice or creating a profile to get to IRL dates faster than you can say Valentine. Want more dating advice and tips? Our dating blog has you covered!