Everyone is always relieved when the new year rolls around, this year being no exception. Recovering from an exhausting election year, people have welcomed 2017 with open arms. New beginnings, a time to improve oneself, and frequently tend to their broken hearts. For those that made it through the anxiety of a New Year’s Eve kiss, the next dilemma creeps up fairly quickly: Valentine’s Day. The universal reminder of the breakup you are still trying to get over. For those of you that did the dumping – bravo. For the other half left wondering, “why me?” We have some answers.
Let’s dive in. Was it the infamous “it’s not you, it’s me?” WhatsYourPrice surveyed 6,842 of its members to determine what caused people to call off their relationships in 2016.
We are all a little raw from the 2016 election. Whether your candidate won or lost, it’s over. But politics brings out a different side, in all of us. If you spent the first Presidential Debate disputing with your partner, I hope you at least had a glass of wine to ease that pain. If the debate didn’t end with the election? Try to go find yourself a different candidate – I’m not referring to a political one this time.
There’s nothing worse. You’re sitting in front of someone you are wildly attracted to. Your imagination is creating a 50 Shades of Grey scene in your mind. The clothes finally come off and you are basically losing your virginity again asking, “are we doing it right?” There might just be some getting used to, figuring out the kinks. But sometimes you have to trust your body – if it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work. Shake hands and move on.
It usually starts with Thanksgiving. Cruel irony. “Aren’t the holidays supposed to bring me joy?” We have all said this to ourselves as we eat another holiday cookie. Unfortunately this is a slippery slope. Maybe your partner casually suggested ordering from the vegan place instead of sharing a box of pizza? To those of you that didn’t catch the hints, we’re sorry. Everyone can be superficial. But if they didn’t love you with an extra 10lbs, they don’t deserve you. However, remember the Friends episode when fat Monica becomes skinny Monica? Embrace the skinny Monica. Eat the cookie, but take care of your body. Not for your partner but for yourself.
Nobody sane wants to have the “you liked their Instagram!,” argument. It’s immature and exhausting. If you found yourself spending half your relationship defending every “like” or saying hello to your attractive coworker while you were on a date, you aren’t alone. If you got out, you were smart to run. For those of you who think you might be jealous? Take a good look in the mirror. Jealousy doesn’t look good on anyone and is probably the reason your ex blocked you on social media.
Money issues are tricky. It started with helping them out during a “tough time.” Fast forward 3 months later coming home to your once hardworking partner to a lazy blob on the couch telling you about all of the 60 Minutes episodes you missed while you were at work. Don’t be the one constantly hoping for a hand out. On the other hand, don’t let money be the reason you sleep alone. It’s called a partnership for a reason. If you’re not doing your part, you’ll most likely be greeted by a middle finger and possibly an eviction notice on your door.
Don’t be swayed by the array of excuses. “I was drunk,” or “it was just that one time.” It wasn’t acceptable during your high school relationship and it sure isn’t now. Relationships are hard enough as it is. Don’t spend your nights wondering if “late night at the office” means “doing the dirty with the secretary on the desk (that has a picture of you on it).” And if you can’t keep it in your pants, please do everyone else a favor and don’t accept the “Facebook official” request.
As feelings deepen, they become harder to control. Intense feelings can lead to crazy thoughts and irrational decisions. Does your significant other show up wherever you happen to be “coincidentally?” Do they act like they are totally dependent upon you and need to be with you at every moment of everyday. Better yet, do you receive countless “good morning”, “good night” and “what are you doing” texts throughout the day? If so, rethink your relationship. Your partner isn’t your parent – they shouldn’t be checking on you and your whereabouts the whole day.
See a trend here? Jealousy, infidelity, it all comes back to lack of trust. Relationships are built on this. The second someone starts to question the integrity and the motives of the other, it is game over. If they have no reason to think you are unfaithful then you shouldn’t let them treat you like you are. Don’t leave yourself in a relationship where you are getting a “We need to talk” text once a week.
What was the reason for your last breakup?