Messaging Etiquette – Do’s and Don’ts
  • Posted Oct 12, 2012
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Sure, online dating enables you to interact at the click of a mouse. But that doesn’t necessarily mean dinner and drinks is a sure thing. He or she may like your initial offer, but first impressions only last so long. Make an even bigger impression by following these messaging guidelines…

Are you as charming on the computer as you are in person?

  • DO be honest and up front about your expectations.
  • DO use proper grammar. Messaging “Woow u r hawt!” is not attractive. Knowing the difference between “your” and “you’re” is.
  • DO write in letter format, not texting format. It shows effort.
  • DO reply politely, even if you’re not interested.
  • DO introduce yourself before asking for their real name.
  • DO integrate their profile information into your message. It shows genuine interest.
  • DO ask engaging questions.
  • DO share personal information after you have built a rapport with your date.
  • DO limit the use of emoticons. You’re not in middle school anymore.
  • DO treat them with respect, even if they don’t agree with your terms.
  • DON’T just wink without messaging.
  • DON’T explicitly ask for sex. Paying for their time doesn’t make them an escort.
  • DON’T send the same message to multiple people. They can tell.
  • DON’T start your message with a pick-up line.
  • DON’T message or reply with one or two words (i.e. Hi There, Hey Sexy, Wanna talk?).
  • DON’T immediately ask for “pics” or their phone number. Once a mutual trust is established, these topics are fair game.
  • DON’T be pretentious or rude, even if you are the benefactor.
  • DON’T curse or swear.
  • DON’T use nicknames/pet names without knowing the person.
  • DON’T send multiple messages in succession. It comes off as desperate and sometimes creepy.

What are some other common do’s and don’ts when messaging other members?

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