20 Reasons To Date A Stoner
  • Posted Apr 22, 2015
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It’s safe to assume that the majority of people have smoked a joint, hit a bong, or even turned a soda/beer can into a makeshift pipe at one point in their life. At the very least, you’ve got friends that have. It’s not even Kevin Bacon Six Degrees of Separation with pot, it’s more like one degree of separation, you know?

Speaking of baking bacon, we’ve compiled a list of reasons why dating or just simply going out with a pothead is a great idea.

Yes, we know what you’re thinking, “4/20 was two days ago now and this probably should have been posted then.” Well, that’s just like, your opinion, man.

 

  1. Stoners are always down to watch a movie.

If you ever feel disinterested in dressing up to go out on the town just to spend a ton of money socializing with a bunch of random strangers in a loud and crowded environment, chances are, your significant other will be more than happy to just relax and watch a movie.

It won’t even matter what you want to watch, so expect no arguments there/here. Sure, your date may completely miss the plot, or overreact to certain jokes or dramatized scenes. By deciding to stay in, you’ve created a theatergoing experience from the comfort of your own couch.

 

  1. They’re always prepared to snack.

A first date is likely to take place with a pothead if there is food involved, sans the need to worry about getting stood up. This is largely due to the fact that standing would require a lot of effort.

You’ll never have to worry about eating alone. But that’s not even the best part. For in-home dining, your partner will grab the most ridiculous assortment of ingredients to craft a one-of-a-kind meal that could only be conjured by the brilliantly creative mind of a stoner. If you think it tastes gross, you clearly lack a refined palate.

 

  1. They will never get angry.

While you may get angry at times, there’s a very strong chance that with everything will always be — to reference Matthew McConaughey — alright, alright, alright. Most pot smokers are laid back individuals who go with the flow because caring about things takes energy.

Last minute change of plans or decide you want to do something spur of the moment? That won’t be a problem because they probably either forgot you did or didn’t have plans anyways.

 

  1. You will be the funniest person alive.

I’m sure you’re just like every other person on the planet and think you are in fact the funniest person alive. You aren’t. But your ganja loving partner will think you are. The laughter won’t be out of pity, or sympathy, just to appease you. It will be an abdominal burning laughter from the deepest parts of their Cheeto and Taco Bell filled stomach.

Sure, you can’t tell the same joke or funny story to anyone else and expect the same reaction because you’ll just end up saying, “You had to be there.” But at least the two of you got to share that moment….

In conclusion:

Despite being a little lazy, a lot hungry, and sometimes downright random, a weed smoking opposite can be the break from sobriety you need to return to your regular life feeling really smart.

There’s like 16 more reasons… but you get the idea. 

16 Responses to “20 Reasons To Date A Stoner”

  1. Sugar Love says:

    Anyone else having problems getting video to work on iPad?

  2. noni says:

    I completely agree :D

  3. Dawn says:

    I’d love to date a stoner where are they?

  4. Tilly says:

    Lol, I do sound like fun don’t I :)

  5. Modus Vivendi says:

    This is the most ridiculous article. have some prestige and respect for yourself.

    I have never smoked a joint and never will. People that have in my opinion are just smoking their brains away and purely just a waste of space. Make something of your life and rather than being a junkie and burden to society.

    • christina says:

      yeah obviously people who smoke weed are total junkies… probably in the same tier as rapists and murderers. Of course thats why modern society is moving towards positive marijuana research and medicinal use is being used in many states along with recreational use now being legalized.

    • Mo says:

      Weed isn’t bad and this article was the best and sooo true lol

  6. Vinny says:

    Its embarrassing to be a member on the site with this kind of articles. What’s next? 15 reasons to date a person with diarrhea? 40 reasons to date an alcoholic?

  7. Mary says:

    Stoners need love too :) Modus Vivendi, valid opinion, but you sound very uneducated with your assumptions and stereotyping.

  8. Jessica says:

    I think if u had enough sense to actually read between the lines,the article is really just
    supposed to be funny.not actual dating advise.come on people..

  9. Laura Ashley says:

    good to know hes a stoner first tho xx

  10. jade says:

    16 reasons to date a stoner…..¨They will never get angry¨ That is SO NOT true! when a stoner drinks, The mixture of the HTC with the alcohol, IN SOME cases that I HAVE witness, unfortunately, it can cause the worst case of squizophrenia in a person and they can certainly become the angriest people of all. And the worst part? they willl not remember the next. HTC + Alcohol= Anger black out
    yes itis true and very well documented. I believe a person should either be a stoner or an alcoholic but NEVER both.

  11. Laurieee says:

    I have to say I’m a stoner and this article is actually quite funny. For those who assume stoners are equivalent to rapist…you’re sick and lack education. So let’s set the record straight, a murderer goes it with the intentions to take the life of another individual while a stoner simply smokes in the confinement of their home to relax their mind from a stressful day. I’m far from being uneducated and it’s simple minded people like you all who fail to realize if America actually legalized marijuana then they could enjoy the profit.

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